Matrescence: The Transformation Into Motherhood
There’s a word I wish every woman heard long before becoming a mother — a word that gives language to the emotional, physical, and identity-shifting journey postpartum brings.
That word is matrescence.
Where the Term Comes From
The term matrescence was coined by anthropologist Dana Raphael in the 1970s. Raphael originally used it to describe the transition a woman undergoes when she becomes a mother, recognizing that motherhood is not simply a role but a profound developmental stage.
Just like adolescence marks the transition from childhood to adulthood, matrescence marks the transition from womanhood to motherhood.
Matrescence Is Like a Second Adolescence
One of the most helpful ways to understand matrescence is to think of it as a second adolescence. Both are major periods of transformation shaped by changes in hormones, identity, relationships, roles, and physical experience.
During adolescence, we form a sense of who we are in the world.
During matrescence, we form a sense of who we are now that we are a mother.
Both can feel:
Confusing and disorienting
Emotional or overwhelming
Full of rapid identity shifts
Marked by big hormonal changes
Painful, beautiful, and deeply formative
No wonder postpartum often doesn’t feel like “getting back to normal” — you aren’t going back. You’re becoming someone new.
What Matrescence Includes
Matrescence isn’t just about giving birth or healing physically. It is a holistic transformation that touches every part of a mother’s life:
Physical Changes
Hormonal shifts, breastfeeding, sleep deprivation, recovery from birth, body image changes, new physical rhythms.
Emotional and Mental Changes
New fears, deeper love, shifting priorities, identity grief, anxiety, intuition strengthening, and emotional rebalancing.
Identity Evolution
Letting go of who you once were and integrating a new identity that includes being a mother — without losing yourself.
Relationship Changes
Partnership dynamics shift, boundaries evolve, friendships change, family roles adapt.
Purpose and Self-Concept
What once defined you may not anymore, and you may find new values, passions, or ways of relating to the world.
It is not just change—it’s metamorphosis.
Why Naming It Matters
So many mothers feel like they’re “struggling” when really, they’re transitioning. Yes, this may be a struggle. It’s not easy to walk into a new version of yourself.
Naming matrescence does a few powerful things:
Normalizes the experience — you’re not alone
Reduces shame and guilt around mixed emotions
Validates that joy and struggle can coexist
Encourages support rather than self-pressure
Honors motherhood as a rite of passage
When we understand that this season is supposed to feel big and complicated, we stop expecting ourselves to “bounce back” — physically or emotionally.
The Emotional Reality
You might feel…
Deep love and deep exhaustion
Grief for your former life + excitement for your new one
Confident one moment, lost the next
Filled up and emptied out all in the same day
Nothing is wrong with you — this is the natural landscape of transformation.
How to Support Yourself Through Matrescence
Here are ways to move through this season with compassion:
Give yourself permission to not have all the answers
Ask for help — from partners, community, or professionals
Create space to reconnect with your identity outside motherhood
Rest, nourish, and listen to your body
Release the expectation of who you “should” be
Seek connection with other mothers
This chapter deserves support, not self-criticism.
A Note on Postpartum Depression (PPD)
It’s important to acknowledge that postpartum depression, anxiety, and other perinatal mood disorders are real, serious, and deserve proper support and care.
This post is not about postpartum depression — though the two can coexist.
Matrescence = a natural developmental transition
Postpartum depression = a clinical mental health condition that may require professional support
Feeling overwhelmed, emotional, or lost during matrescence doesn’t automatically mean you’re experiencing postpartum depression. But if you’re feeling persistently hopeless, disconnected, numb, or unable to function, you deserve support.There is absolutely no shame in seeking help.
Both experiences are valid — and talking about matrescence does not erase the importance of recognizing and supporting mental health during postpartum.
A Loving Reminder to New Mothers
You are not meant to be who you were before — and that’s not failure.
It’s growth.
You are in the process of becoming someone new, someone wiser, stronger, expanded, and deeply rooted in a love you are still learning how to hold.
This is your matrescence.
A passage. A rebirth. A becoming.
And you don’t have to walk through it alone.